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Moms vs friends…….

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When I am up and out the door before 6:00am to walk the dogs, it can be a very quiet and peaceful time (not always)….but this morning was. The dogs aren’t really great conversationalist, and if I am walking along, talking to the dogs and someone does happen to notice us having a conversation, they may find that a little disturbing to say the least……so if the walk is going well I tend to get caught up in my own thoughts. Never sure where those thoughts might take me…..I can seem to be a bit random sometimes…..just ask my husband and my kids, they will certainly vouch for that. (My thought process always follows a pattern in my head, but sometimes the thoughts that I blurt out seem to come from nowhere to those around me). 🙂

This morning I got thinking about all of the people I know who claim to hate their Mother. These people actually use the word “hate” when describing their relationship with their Mom. I’m lucky that I can’t imagine how awful your mom must have been or may still be to you to describe how you feel about her in that way. These people say they don’t call their mom because, “She doesn’t call me, so why should I call her?”, or “I have better things to do than to call my mom, if she wants to talk to me she can call me.” I live a fair distance away from my mom and don’t get to see her very often. I don’t even call her as often as I think I should because I get busy, but I certainly don’t ever not call her because she hasn’t called me.

My mom was fairly strict with me and my siblings when we were growing up compared to some of my friends moms. I would say she took her parenting role very seriously. Growing up there were lots of times that I didn’t necessarily “like” my mom for making me do chores…..such as baking on Saturday mornings, making my bed, doing the dishes, vacuuming, folding laundry and all sorts of other things that I still don’t like to do…..or for not letting me do things I wanted to do…..like hanging out with my friends, talking on the phone forever, leaving the school property at lunch time, etc., etc. Every kid wants to be able to do whatever they want to do, whenever they want to do it, mine certainly do. However I don’t ever recall “hating” my mom.

My mom was always my parent….not my friend. I had friends, I didn’t need my mom to be my friend, I needed her to be my parent…..to say no when it was easier to say yes. That doesn’t mean we didn’t do “friend” things, we did. We went on shopping trips and visits together, we laughed and we cried together, and sometimes we laughed so hard….(at things others would not even find remotely funny)……that it seemed like we were crying. We have had struggles and conflicts, good times and bad times, but the good out weigh the bad a million times over in my memories.

Today, as an adult and as a mom myself, I do think of my mom as my friend. She has stood by me for 48 (almost 49) years. Through every good and bad choice I have ever made, every mistake I have ever made….of which there have been many……she has been there for me. I know my mom has been disappointed by many of my choices over the course of my life, because as a mom we always want our kids to make “smart” choices, but whenever I needed (or still need) my mom, she is there for me.

Every time I hear someone say how much they hate their mom I thank God that in the “Mom Lottery”, I got the best mom a kid could ever have. I’m sure I take my mom for granted sometimes, even though I don’t mean to, but I can’t imagine what my life might be like today if it hadn’t been for her love and guidance when I needed it the most…..everyday!! 🙂

My mom

Thanks Mom….I love you!!!

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